HERE'S TO ALL THE MEN WHO DATE WITH INTEGRITY

My husband asked me to marry him on our second date!

He told me that he was not looking for a girlfriend but for a wife. Basically, what he meant was that if we were not going to relate with the intention of getting married, we should not even begin the relationship.

Needless to say, I was livid! How dare he? How dare he ask me to marry him without getting to know me first? Without dating me, taking me out numerous times, buying dinners, chocolate, jewelery and loads of flowers. How dare he take such a short cut? I was only 21 years old.

I spent the next date lecturing and "schooling" him on how he should have done it. I drew him a chart and explained how we are supposed to move from strangers to acquaintances, to close acquaintances to friends, to close friends, to going steady, to dating, to engaged and then get married.

Eventually though, I said yes and we began dating, with the aim of getting married. We did go out daily, we ate the chocolates, I got the flowers and everything else that I thought he was trying to forfeit. Even when the time came to get engaged, he went on his knee and proposed. :-)

With hindsight, I realize just how blessed I was. In a generation where men are becoming more and more emasculated and undecided about relationships, here was a man who was clear and to the point. He wasn't willing to waste my time and didn't want me to waste his either. I didn't have to wonder where we were heading. He wanted me to meet his mum even before I was ready. I didn't have to decipher whether he was more interested in me than his buddies. He was CRISP CLEAR that he wanted me!

Here's to all the straight forward men out there. To all the men of integrity when it comes to relationships and marriage. You are a diminishing but precious minority. To all of you who refuse to waste a woman's time by wooing her enough to maintain interest but never committing to her. You who shun the bad habit of taking a woman's most precious youth and then, telling her after ten years that you sense you should go in different directions. You who never make her insecure by seeing other women, spending more time with the guys or even preferring your mother. You who honor her sexuality and refuse to have sex with her until you marry her. You who understand, that she comes from a family that loves her and has a Heavenly Father who watches her and therefore treat her with respect and dignity. May God bless you and honor you for your integrity. May He give you your heart's desire with the right and the best wife, who goes beyond all your dreams.

If you are not this man, but are guilty of the relationship evils mentioned. Know that you can change. It's never too late to improve. Just remember that what you do to any woman, you shall stand accountable to God for. You may discard her easily, your friends and family may even encourage you to forget her quickly, you may leave her for another and seemingly get away with it, but God who created her will make sure that, unless you repent, you will reap exactly what you sow.

Ladies, if you are the one wasting a man's time, may you do the dignified thing and leave him alone. May you be a tremendous blessing to him by getting out of his life. Never string anyone along. Never date anyone you cannot see yourself marrying. Never say yes when you don't mean to. Only date the person that you are ready to marry. Otherwise, you are both  setting yourselves up for unnecessary entanglement and wasting precious years.

Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap.Galatians 6:7

Barikiweni